9 things that I have cried about as a parent

17 Dec 2017

 

I love a bit of gender stereotyping so I know it's not particularly macho admitting you cry as a man. The thing is, I cry in a really manly way... 

 

1. When they put a cannula in Issue Number 1 (aka The Pioneer) 

 

I didn’t cry when my son was born.  I don’t know why as it was a hugely emotional experience. I think the combination of him being a little premature and it being our firstborn created a cocktail of numbness and worry rather than overwhelming "cry" inflicting emotion. The Pioneer was a healthy weight but he still looked diddy in my eyes, so when he had to stay in hospital for five days (we didn’t know how long at the time) it was heart-breaking. But, I didn’t cry then either. 

 

But when I had to take him out of the ward to another part of the hospital, whilst wifey rested, to insert a cannula in his tiny arm into barely visible veins I lost my sherbert*. I sobbed as his little lip wrinkled and as he began to scream wondering why on earth he was getting stabbed by a stranger. Well, technically, everyone was a stranger to him, but you get the idea. 

 

2. Listening to "Supermarket Flowers" by Ed Sheeran 

 

The scar that was left by the death of my mother will clearly always be there, so anything that stirs memories of her will always smash me right in the feels department. Aside from it being a superbly written song, when the lyrics "you were an angel in the shape of my mum" kick in, I'm toast. 

 

3. Hearing about the Manchester terrorist attack 

 

I'm not going to pretend that this attack touched me in any personal way. Thankfully, nobody I knew was caught up in the horrendous event, not that this makes it any better. The news that children were deliberately targeted and killed had me shedding a tear. Arising more out of the selfish thought of how I might feel if my children were harmed in this way, it's gut-wrenching and infuriating in equal measure. I still cannot comprehend the reason for deliberately wishing to cause this sort of harm on others. Unfortunately, a sad reminder of our broken world. 

 

4. When I got kicked by Issue Number 2 (aka The Wrecking Ball) 

 

Got kicked in the Percy Pigs* by The Wrecking Ball a couple of weeks ago. Enough said. Her response, "I am sooooo sorry daddy, sooooo sorry" before running away cackling like a demented hyena. #cancelthevasectomy 

 

5. Speaking of which... 

 

I swear, the mere thought of that op brings a tear to my eye... 

 

6. Birth of Issue Number 3 (aka The Allergy Baby) 

 

I didn’t cry when The Pioneer or when The Wrecking Ball were born, so it's a bit strange that I cried when The Allergy Baby was. It had nothing to do with the nails that Wifey had dug into my hands either, despite blood being drawn. True story. 

 

7. Baby Charlie Gard 

 

The controversy around the treatment of Charlie Gard was sobering.  Whilst I cannot comment on the rights or wrongs of any decisions made, the mere thought of not being able to do anything for your child suffering from a severe or terminal illness is utterly heart-breaking. Seeing photos of Baby Charlie and his parents in the media doing all they could to raise money and awareness was distressing. Then, the sad speech by Charlie's father that they were left with no option other than to stop the fight for Charlie's treatment made me cry. It was a sharp reminder for me of just how fortunate our family are.  

 

8. Reading The Pioneer's first school nursery report 

 

Reading my son's first school nursery report was largely reassuring to hear that he is a kind, caring and imaginative child who socialises well. But, what got me was the comment that he responds well to a challenge but easily gets down-hearted when he experiences failure. This brought a tear to my eye. The thought that he would strive for success is a great thing, but an accentuated feeling of disappointment when faced with failure in a child so young was upsetting. It's sad to think the skinny cheery boy feels the pressure to be perfect, but I'm also heartened by the fact that he has a lot of life lessons to learn and one of those is that failure is inevitable and nothing to be ashamed of. 

 

9. Watching Comic Relief / DIY SOS / Up etc etc 

 

Need I say more!? 

 

 

* Substituting swear words with confectionery.  Sweet game strong. 

 

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